The ping'ology.

Some observations of popular net-slangs,chat replies etc over the time....

Lol/LOL/lolz/lolllll11111!!

This ping will win the award for the most popular and hackeneyed reply on chat any day any time.Once upon a time it used to denote "Laughing out Loud".Now it can serve as a reply to almost anything.Half the people don't even know the full form of Lol...They think it's an alternative to "ok".(so dont get surprised if you get a "lol" for "Damn man..I had a terrible day today").Blame it on their ignorance.

Another less common version is ROTFL (which is again a truncated version of ROTFLMAO-Rolling on the floor laughing my ass out).Because it's longer than a tiny lol(and bit hard to get the abbreviation correct in one go) it is safe to assume that when people type this,you have cracked something that actually made them laugh.(though it's just an assumption :D)

Hmmm/hmm/hmmmmmmmmmmmmm..(to infinity)

Now apparently self explanatory,this is becoming a more and more confusing reply.It can mean an affirmative reply ("Yes" or "Ok"),or it can be a gap filler (in case the receipint does not not what to reply),or more commonly a contemplation.

This ping always makes the other person a bit uneasy especially if you have said something that you wish you hadn't and the other person replies with a thoughtful Hmm.I remember there was a nice and apt smiley for this on Yahoo messenger.

Sup/wazzp/wassssssssssssp

The only thing that is up after seeing this ping is the annoyment.Agreed it is a globally accepted icebreaker or a conversation starter.But now it has become a commonplace.People who are or were,or will never be interested in what is going up in your life will ping this just almost instinctively after the casual hi.

Observe the following template..I am sure you will get a mini-Deja vu....

P1:Hey dud

P2:Hi

P1:sup/wasssp/wazzp

P2:nm.u say.

P1:*damn!!!...what do I say now*

P2:*yaaaawn*

P1:Hwz life

P2:goin good.

P1:*arrrghhh...why did I pinged him in the first place*

P1:brb ("I am never coming back...")

p2:k ("Oh...you were still here")

Thats how sad it looks.Yet we do it.Again and again :)

Anyway a good substitution which is yet to become an irritant is "Howdy".Although not for long.

k/kk

Another irritating reply.How big a word is "ok" to shorten it even more.The ease of typing it;1 keystroke (anything more and you might just run outta breath grrrh).Imagine a scenario.Your friend asks you the regular "wasssp".Fortunately you have had a great day full of happenings.You take pains to type all that without looking up what your friend has to say over that.Once you finish the marathon ping all you see is those little tiny irritating "k"s in between your generous verbiage-laden paras.

It should be banned.People,agreed its an sms lingo,but atleast have courtsey to type freaking 'O' and a 'K' possibly along with a happy smiley no matter how boring the ping is to you.(For that purpose,why to even ask what is up).

Fraaaaaandship/freindshps/frandssssss

Now this deserves a special mention.The context is the tons of friend requests girls get everyday (checked for 2 of my cousin sisters and a friend) by the newbies-wannabies-MetooWannaOrkutFacebookers.

Once joined a social network their main goal in life zeroes down to having 4287346287346827346 friends in their list ASAP.The priority is of course 'gaaals'.So a girl in a display pic(even if the profile belonged to a guy) or a "female" in the profile description is more than enough criteria for them to add such.

And this is generally they send with the friend request to add a personal touch.

"Heyyy,u lukk very butiful..wannna have fraaandship wimmme.plss"

Or if he is slightly more well versed in English then

"Hey beautiful....can we be friends forever"

Yes I have seen this on my sister's profile.The page is generally full of friend requests from random people..

Arent we Indians despos....lolllzzzz

Brb

Be right back.This is an official timeout in the chat conversation.Also people tend to reply brb and never return to avoid answering uneasy questions :p

This is an effective tool against someone who is chat-badgering you.It's a real piss-off when you are on the receiving side of it though. :)

Huh

There are 2 forms of Huh..

If followed by a question mark refers to the unclear reception of the message...(as in "huh?? what did you say??")

If not then it means a displeasure or a mock anger shown at your ping.(as in "why did you say what you said...huh..)

Again,there was a very fitting emoticon to represent this reply on yahoo mesenger.

I love this ping specially for its second interpretation.It's even more sweet when someone pings it to you :p

Nm

Nevermind.Or Nothing much.(generally followed by nm..u say)Both serves as a fitting reply to the ever vexing "wassssp".It's an indication from the recipient that I am not interested in chitchating about what is up in my life..come to the point please.(thusly passing the ball in wasssp'ers court)

Besides this,NM to write about this one.. :D

Dude/dud/dood

Ok a little trivia about this platitudinal address first.

Dude

-An informal form of address for a man

-A man who is much concerned with his dress and appearance

Dud

-Someone who is unsuccessful

To be frank I didn't know the distiction for quite long..Until I addressed one of our senior project member who apparently is well versed with English by Dud.Never again I address anyone by Dud again.(Not "unintentionally"....come on there are always some unsuspecting targets("duds") who would never have a clue about it :p).And Dood is not even a word.It just a lazily metamorphised version of dude.Relatively uncommon address to a girl is Dudette.Mostly it's gal,babe,babezzz,dear etc.

A nice change from the regular dude/gal/dud etc would be using exotic addresses like senorita(for girl),senor(Guy),comrade,paisan(godfather fame :D ).They sound lot less like a thud.

More to follow soon....(Yes you guess right.I don't have anything better to do right now) :)

Peace..